The main catalyst behind cognitive scientist and podcaster Maya Shankar‘s was the process she went through after “a heartbreaking loss” (People.com).
“Life has a way of thwarting our best-laid plans. Out of nowhere, we’re confronting the end of a relationship, an unexpected diagnosis, the loss of a job, or some other twist of fate. In these moments, it can feel like we’re free-falling into the unknown,” states the book blurb.
Publishers Weekly calls it “…a pragmatic, research-based guide to surviving life’s biggest disruptions.” People she interviewed “include Olivia Lewis, a college student who battled through the aftermath of a catastrophic stroke by letting go of her obsession with others’ approval and investing in her recovery; Dwayne Betts, who was inspired to start writing poetry in prison by a fellow inmate who was making the most of his sentence; and Matt Gutman, a broadcast journalist who escaped a spiral of self-recrimination following an on-air error by ‘zooming out’ to consider other people’s takes on the situation.” (See this prior post about Matt Gutman.)
Shankar’s 2023 TED TAlk was a precursor to the book in that she addressed “Why Change Is Scary—And How to Unlock Its Potential.” Two main points she makes are that change involves two biggies many of us fear and find difficult: uncertainty and loss.
Some pertinent quotes from this lecture:
Research shows that we’re more stressed when we’re told we have a 50 percent chance of getting an electric shock than when we’re told we have a 100 percent chance. It’s wild, right? I mean, we’d rather be sure that a bad thing is going to happen than to have to deal with any uncertainty. Change is also scary because it involves loss of some kind.
We become different people on the other side of change. What we’re capable of, what we value, and how we define ourselves, these things can all shift. And if we can learn to pay close attention to these internal shifts, we may just find that rather than limiting us, change can actually expand us.
…(T)hree questions you can ask yourself the next time life throws you that dreaded curveball…
1. How might this change change what you’re capable of?
2. How might this change change what you value?
3. How might this change change how you define yourself?
Selected Reviews of The Other Side of Change
BookPage: “Perfect for readers whose lives have undergone dramatic change, the book will also be useful to anyone interested in exploring the nuances of what we can and can’t control.”
Brené Brown: “The Other Side of Change is a rare combination of beautiful storytelling, cognitive science, and wholehearted wisdom. How lucky are we to have Maya walk with us through the unexpected and often uninvited moments that shape who we are and how we make our way through the world.”
Adam Grant: “A wise and poignant read for our turbulent times. With powerful stories and practical science, Maya examines how we find purpose after adversity and possibility under uncertainty.”
